I had been used to being quite helpless when I was a quadriplegic so
the need to be bathed and dressed before my hooks were on was something
I could accept. I rather liked the feeling of not being able to do
anything with my stumps, or should I say my restrained arms. All I could
do was move my elbows around. I wanted real stumps. After a couple of
weeks I got used to the added handicap the above elbow prosthesis
imposed on me. Locking and unlocking my elbows became second nature. I
learned how to position my hooks to do things. With no ability to rotate
my forearm I had to rotate my hooks themselves.
The first few months went by fairly quickly. I was out a lot with
Kevin and my aunt. I loved to shop and go out to eat. I knew that I
would go through with my amputations and the remaining months of my test
period were just a pain. I knew I wanted to be like this for the rest of
my life. I had no doubts. I loved the way I looked with two lovely hooks
where my hands would be.
Finally the six months were up. After the doctor was thoroughly
convinced that I truly wanted a permanent body modification that would
give me a very significant handicap that I would have for the rest of my
life he agreed to proceed with the surgery.
The Point of no Return
After I entered the hospital I insisted that my arms continue to be
restrained. I had not used my hands for the past six months and had
accepted that I never would again. I did not want to be tempted. On the
day of the surgery both of my arms were marked at the level of my
pending amputations. I wanted them as high up as possible leving only as
much stump as I would need for my prosthesis. I wanted my two stumps to
be as useless as possible without wearing my hooks.
“Are you absolutely sure you want to do this Paula?” my doctor said.
“Yes, more than anything,” I replied.
After the surgery I woke up in kind of a haze. I was covered with a
sheet up to my armpits, but my two heavily bandaged stumps were on top
of the sheet. I was really a double arm amputee. My arms were gone
forever. I would never be able to feel things with my hands. For a
moment I thought how much I loved to feel my breasts and the female
parts between my legs. Then I thought that a cold hook always did the
trick and I would have two of them. It wasn’t until later that I started
to feel the pain. I was given strong pain killers. I could move my
stumps just a little before the pain got worse. I couldn’t wait to see
what they looked like without the bandages.
I was released a couple of days later. My stumps were still bandaged
of course. I stayed in bed as I still had significant pain. My aunt had
to feed me and give me sponge baths. Kevin was thrilled when he saw my
“They’re really gone!” he said seeing my stumps for the first time.
“Of course they’re gone,” I replied. “Do you like me this way?”
“God yes. I can’t wait until I see you in your new hooks knowing that
you only have little stumps and you need hooks for real.”
I too couldn’t wait. I wanted so badly to go out in public wearing a
sleeveless top and showing off my prosthetics. There would be no doubt
in anyone’s mind that I had no arms. They would see that my forearms
were not sockets containing below the elbow stumps. I knew that most
people would feel sorry for me because I was so handicapped. If they
After several visits to the doctor, and all stitches removed, I could
finally see what my stumps looked like. I loved them. They were still
swollen and would have to be reduced by elastic bandages before I could
be molded for my prosthesis, but I loved them. The pain was gone for the
most part and I could move my stumps around as I wanted. They were
useless for pretty much everything. They were too short to meet in front
of my so I couldn’t hold anything. I could poke things with them, but
that served no purpose. If I could get something under my stump I could
hold it, but that too was not any help with daily needs.
My first outing in public was with my aunt. My stumps were bandaged
with elastic bandages. I insisted on wearing a sleeveless top. Oh boy
did I get looks and comments. I heard numerous exclamations.
“That poor girl, I think her arms were recently amputated. How
horrible to have to spend the rest of your life without arms. I guess
she will be able to use those metal hooks.”
I loved the attention. I especially liked going to a restaurant where
my aunt had to feed me. One thing I did not like was needing help in the
ladies room. I had no way to get my panties down, not to mention a skirt
of pants. My aunt combed my hair and touched up my makeup. Of course I
hadn’t applied it. All I could do was walk around. I wanted my hooks so
It was a month later that my stumps were shrunk enough to be molded.
I was so proud to walk into the prosthetist’s office with real stumps
hanging down from my shoulders. In a week my hooks were ready. You can’t
imagine how excited I was to slip my stumps into the sockets and open
and close my hooks for the first time with only stumps. My hooks felt so
much better without any arms and hands curled up inside. I was on cloud
I was offered the opportunity to go for rehab training. I knew I did
not need it. The only reason I went a few times was to see if I would
meet any other arm amputees my age. I did meet a girl who had lost only
one arm below the elbow. Her name was Sarah. She was devastated. Once
she met me and saw that I was far worse off than she was she started to
accept her situation. I fe;t good that I could give her some
encouragement. The day she left she came over to me.
“Oh Paula, I don’t know what I would have done if I hadn’t met you.
You have two hooks and I have only one. I am so lucky. I know that I can
get by from now on. I guess we are hooked together in a funny sort of
“Well we belong to a small group. We are hook girls,” I said
I now loved shopping with Darlene. I was now the more handicapped
since she was a double below the elbow arm amputee and I was a double
above the elbow amputee, No more pretending. I was truly and permanently
disabled. I would need my hooks for the rest of my life. I had no
problem with that, of course.
I came back to the present. My makeup was fully applied. It certainly
was quite a year. After a quick breakfast my aunt dropped me at the mall
at our prearranged time. I felt so proud walking in. I loved the way
people looked at me. It was even more enjoyable knowing that I was not a
pretender. I spotted Darlene a couple of minutes later. She was easy to
spot with her two hooks. She had on a long sleeve top.
“A tank top? I guess you don’t want to hide your prosthesis.”
“No way. Maybe I will even turn on a few guys,” I replied laughing.
“Well that skirt and your boobs will probably distract them from your
“Yeah, but you know that a lot of guys get turned on by our hooks.
Kevin certainly does.”
“You really like being a real amputee now, don’t you?”
“God yes. I know you find it hard to understand, but I love being
For the next couple of hours we shopped and tried things on. Darlene
had to help me more than I had to help her. Neither of us could do
everything without help. I liked the fact that I had to use my control
cables to raise and lower my arms, unlike Darlene. Of course I had to
lock my elbows to open and close my hooks. I was getting better at
getting money out of my wallet and managing my shoulder bag. We stopped
at the ladies room. It was still a little hard for me to get my panties
down to pee. At least things were easier with a skirt. We checked our
makeup and headed for the food court.
Now that I had a real and permanent handicap I was happier than ever.
I was a beautiful female with a perfect body except for what was
missing. I knew I had made the right choice of handicap. I knew I looked
incredibly sexy with my hooks to a certain segment of the male
population. I enjoyed me need for help with certain things. Being bathed
by someone was one of them. The occasional feeling of being unable to do
something that others could do easily was always welcome. I liked the
attention I got shopping when sales associates helped me with things
like trying on a bra. The way they looked when I slipped out of my
prosthesis so my bra could be removed and a new one fitted always turned
me on. Of course one of the most fun things was when a devotee spotted
me and followed me around the mall. I always put on a little show.
My relationship with Kevin was stronger than ever. He loved my
stumps, hooks, and everything else about me. We had great sex. He still
wants to marry me when the time comes. But first, we are headed off to
college next year. We plan to get an apartment and he will take care of
me. He loves to shave my legs, bathe me, and do anything for me that I
can’t do myself.
I can’t imagine that I could be any happier. I was once an able
bodied boy. A boy! That was horrible. I didn’t have lovely full breasts,
a wonderful vagina, and I didn’t need prosthetic hooks. I couldn’t dress
in sexy female lingerie and clothing. No panties, no bras, no stockings
and garter belts, no high heels, no short skirts, and no tank tops to
show off my hooks. Could anything be worse?